Motherhood has taught be so much about needing the Lord for strength. Let me back up... when I got married I was shocked by how much of my selfishness was revealed and how much I needed the Lord to be changing me. When I became a mommy, this selfishness was again revealed by the Lord. Marriage is easier in one sense because it is a give-and-take relationship. You serve your spouse and they serve you (if you are both trying to seek the Lord and honor Him in your marriage).
Being a parent is not like that. When your infant comes into this world, they honestly have no regard for your feelings or how tired you are. All they can do is cry to let you know that they are hungry, tired, or dirty. You give and give and give with barely anything coming back. Yes, you love your child so much and their precious face fills you with love and thankfulness but it does get so exhausting when those first few months are just you and your spouse loving continually on this child that cannot really show you that they love you yet. During those first few months of having a newborn, I was again brought to my knees and realized so much that I needed the strength of the Lord to keep going.
This whole year the Lord has been putting Psalms in my life to remind me constantly that He is my Rock... He is my Shield... He is my Strength... He is my Rest... Though it has at times been a very difficult season, I have felt so many times that the Lord was calling me to come to Him and find peace. I know that the Lord is near when we call on Him.
After those first few months, most babies will start sleeping more and giving their mom more time to rest. Zoee did just that. She started going to bed around 7:30pm and only waking up once to eat and then sleeping until at least 7am. Well, then comes the teething stage!! Not to scare anyone who is not a parent... but parenting is difficult at times. It is such a wonderful thing to raise your children but it is also one of the hardest things you will ever do. The past few nights Zoee has been teething very badly. Two nights ago she was up from 12:30am-3:30am just crying and fussing because she was in pain. Last night was not as bad- she was only up from about 2am-3:15am but my point is that I am again being brought to a place of complete need of the Lord. The only way that I can get through these tough nights and still love and serve my family with joy is through the strength of the Lord. I have been constantly trying to depend on His power to fill me and give me the ability to do what He has called me- and do it with a joyful heart so that my family will see Christ in me. Though these last few days have been harder, I love when the Lord reminds me that I need Him. I cannot be the mom I feel He wants me to be without completely depending on Him to lead me. If you are in a season where you feel exhausted and weary, please remember to go to the Lord for your strength. He loves when we recognize our great need for Him and He loves coming to us to give us peace and rest. Come to Him. You will not be disappointed.
Here are a few verses that have been strength for me lately...
"As for me, I will call upon God, And the Lord shall save me. Evening and noon and morning I will pray and cry aloud, And He shall hear my voice." ~Psalm 55:16-17
"To You, my Strength, I will sing praises; For God is my defense, My God of mercy" ~Psalm 59:17
"I remember your name in the night, O Lord, and I keep you law." ~Psalm 119:55
"The name of the Lord is a strong tower, the righteous run to it and are safe." ~Proverbs 18:10
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