Children of God

So many things have happened since I last wrote. I was not sure a while back if the Lord was wanting me to spend time "blogging" but lately I have felt the urge to share with others the joys and struggles that we have gone through. I also wanted another way to connect with the girls in our student ministry as I know that this next season of life with two babies will pretty much require me to be at home more. Thinking way ahead, I also hope to one day print this into a book for my children in hopes that it will serve as an encouragement to them...

I will write Sonny's version of how the Lord has been speaking to him in and in little while I will write mine. It might seem really weird but every time we are about to go on a retreat or have a big event with our students in student ministry- Sonny and I usually struggle with feelings of inadequacy. We will feel like we are not good enough for this responsibility or that we do not have what it takes to minister effectively to these students. It's weird but it always happens right before something huge.

Well, in addition to feeling inadequate, Sonny has often struggled this year with not feeling God's love for him as a son. We both acknowledge that God loves all of His children in a broad sense, but Sonny was just really wanting to know that God specifically loves him and is proud of him as a son. He has often referred back to the gospels when the Father tells the whole crowd that Jesus is His Son and He is pleased with Him. Sonny and I have been praying often this year that God would show Sonny in a tangible way that God is proud of him as a son. I knew that God would eventually answer this prayer but I was not sure how. The "how" is actually amazing...

On Asher's birthday (June 14th) God told Sonny in two very special ways that He loved him and was proud of him. First, Sonny was meeting with some men that he meets with on a weekly basis and he was able to talk to his mentor/spiritual father about a wedding that Sonny had officiated the day before. I do not know all of the details but Sonny came away so encouraged as he felt God had told him through Paul that Sonny was loved and that God was proud of him. It was so special to see how encouraged he was.

Later that night, Sonny got a call from his dad in New Jersey. His dad was calling to wish Asher a happy birthday but he and Sonny ended up talking for almost two hours. When Sonny got off, he was just glowing. Again, I do not know the exact details of the conversation but Sonny again came away feeling that he was loved as a son and that he had a father that was proud of him. We were both so encouraged that evening and to know that God had it all happen on birthday of Sonny's son- I still cannot get over how special God made that day!

So, if you are ever struggling with feeling like you, specifically, are not loved by the Father- keep praying. I know that God does want to show each of His children in a special, tangible way that He loves us- just like He did to Jesus at His baptism. Know that if you have trusted in Christ as your Lord and Savior- He does love you so much, even if you do not feel it right now. For Sonny, it has taken almost a year for God to answer this prayer request so it might not be tomorrow that God answers that prayer for you. One more bit of encouragement: even though it has taken a while for Sonny to see his prayer answered, I feel that the answer was so much sweeter after waiting and praying for it for so long. Hang in there!